Thursday, April 29, 2010

Take a Breather...

I've been in LA for exactly two weeks...fourteen days.  I feel lost and wide-eyed like Astrid from White Oleander.  And let me just clarify something.  Although i'm already dinosaurean-for-a-girl-in-LA @ 26...LOL!, this move has been the biggest thing I've ever done in my entire life.  I've moved to NYC before, but it was still Eastern Standard time and i could be home in an hour and a half by jet.  It has been a difficult transition.  The reality of it is, i went from a hotel to sleeping on a couch and living out of my six boxes of clothes and shoes.... to being in a hotel again and then a downtown loft.... and in two days, i will be in an apartment with my own bed, my own bathroom, my own balcony, my new home. (and hopefully i will soon have a new vespa!).  Now as the smoke settles down, I find myself missing home.  I miss my fatass chihuahua, Pippi.  I miss my friends.  I miss the simplicity of being in the ATL bubble that's so easy and so routine.  I miss the structure of my old life.  Yes, I know, two weeks isn't exactly an earth shattering accomplishment, but Atlanta is central base.  It's my epicenter.  I had a great conversation with a friend today.  He compared people to ships.

"When a ship is built, it's always safe in the harbor.  But the real reason a ship is built is to go out to face the withstand storms and the uncertainty." 

This is something I've always been afraid of doing...headbutting the unfamiliar and saying, "newb or not, fuck u, i belong here."

I know there's a reason for everything.  And I know that as soon as some time passes, I'll be alright.  I'm being pushed really hard to do something I'm terrified of.  I have no safety net or contingency plan. But this is what really makes or breaks people, isn't it?  Not only am I here to work and jumpstart a career...but more importantly, I'm here to learn about myself and break out of my shell. Yeah, I have shell and as elaborate as it may be, it's hard like an emu egg.  Except, I'm like a faberge egg...cuz i'm fab. 

FABerge bad egg

Last night over drinks, I met the Senior VP of Clearwire. He's so "normal".  I thought it was so cute how he just sat there, drinking his pint, making little jokes here and there trying to be hip and cool.


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