Thursday, July 8, 2010

Gossip Girls

Sup bitches! =)  Well now that the whole jail thing is outta the way, and the whole world has seen my fuglyass mugshot, let's take a moment of silence for Lilo.  Poor Lilo.  Good thing she is lesbitronic.

Besides meeting up with lawyers and making countless phone calls and going to the dentist and work and cooking and cooking, and washing my dogs with Tigi Bedhead Dumb Blonde shampoo, I've been catching up on some reading aka creepily stalking other ppls' blogs and came across something that i find interesting / funny / pertinent.  How to know when your friends or acquaintances are talking about you behind your back.  Not that i care if they do because that keeps things interesting for me and puts things into perspective.  And in some cosmic way, when i come across rumors or gossip regarding myself, it humbles me.  And i think, "dayamnnn liz, fix yo shit!"  hahaha, jk.
The Tell-Tale Signs that you may be a topic of conversation:
1.  This friend/acquaintance talks about other friends: "Those who gossip with you, gossip about you" goes the saying, and it's true today. It's the easiest way to know preemptively and avoid getting hurt.


2.  Stops talking or abruptly changes the subject when you approach: Of course, she could be talking about something private, something she wants nobody but that person to hear, but it's not a good sign either way.


3.  Another friend knows things you didn't tell her: If there's familiarity where there shouldn't be, think of who you've already told.
Pretty straightforward, yeah?  I think so.  I think we Koreans have a tendency to effing dieeeeee if we fall upon a juicy secret and our big ole heads basically implode if it's kept for too long; yet for the most part we stay quiet because despite everything, nobody wants to be pegged as the gossip wildfire arsonist.  Solution?  We tend to gossip in cliques which is much safer.  OR IS IT ~ ???  hmm... tough food for the thought to swallow.  Are u safe in your tight-knit, leakproof gossip clique?  my experiences:  the existence of human error means nothing is ever really a secret... despite cross-my-heart-hope-to-die pinky promises.  Despite friend to friend confidentiality.  Let me tell you something: I have heard things about people and their families that they probably could not even dream would ever reach my ears (and i'm so out of the social loop).  And it makes me cringe to think about what people might've heard about me.  You know what i mean? It's crazy!

I'll be the first to admit, i've done it.  I let slip some wildly scandalous inside info that i'd been hearing to an older brother type figure that i'd trusted.  He's probably reading this right now and IM STILL MAD AT YOU.  Well... to be fair to myself, it was more of a legal question because i'd read something about these particular circumstances and this guy has extensive knowledge of the law.  To my utter shock and HUMILIATION, he then proceeded to go directly to that person and tell them what i had said and to ask them if it's true.  It made me look like a terrible person and HUGE gossip, of course!  I learned from this incident to be careful and BE QUIET and to assume that everyone has grotesquely huge mouths.  I learned to never let my guard down, even to a close and trusted friend.  Each day is a battle of wills for me, whether it's what to eat, what to drink, what to say, who to associate with, etc. just as it is for every person.  I have to win every battle.  Currently, i'm fighting the battle against alcohol because in my life.... let's just say that alcohol opens many boxes that need to stay closed for me.  Nothing good ever comes from being buzzed or drunk and having cash on hand.  And i know for many of my friends and peers, nothing good comes from being drunk and attempting to drive home, right?  Oh, and i'm also fighting the battle against cursing because i curse like a sailor and it looks trashtastical.  Plus, God doesn't like it.  When i was really innocent back in the day, i used to slap myself for taking the Lord's name in vain and somehow it's come to F this and F that and Fbombs flying all over the Fing place.

Anyways, I felt so horrible after this eyeopening ordeal that even today, i barely make a peep anymore in social situations because i am paranoid that any little something i might say could be read as an insinuation or implication in someone else's overly zealous thought processes; and this person might get it twisted or take something out of context.  It's like the motherfreakin thought police.  And i'm being eyeballed with a mayjahhh zoom lens.  AM I PARANOID OR WHAT??  SEE??  So now, i'm sure i come off as an informationless, out-of-the-loop bore, but i'd rather be a big bore than an info whore.  Or something like that.

PS. Random blurb:  my sister (Astrid) used to secretly makeout with "talk to" the man who, today, is Justin Beiber's manager... who also happens to be a motherfreakin genius in plainclothes.  AHAHAHAHHAA!!!  Sorry Astrid.  Just felt like putting that out there.  i've been such a gossip bore that i totally imploded.  (^_~)

PPS. Will somebody please PLEASE make us a header image / banner?  i'm not artsy enough to create a cool banner that's fitting for us.

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OH! before i forget... i guess it's only fitting to answer a quick email now while we're on the topic of gossip!


Hi,

I read your blog, obviously.  I have questions for the Park Sisters:

1.  Why is Esther between Los Angeles & Atlanta & Las Vegas?
actually, she's settled in LA now.  She used to travel quite often to see friends and party and what not, but she's taking a breather from all that and doing some work in fashion/entertainment.  Learning the ropes.
2. Why did Liz take all those pills with alcohol?
Uhhhh..... I kind of live on the edge when it comes to that sort of rubbish.  Which is not a good thing, for sure.  I've begun steps to steer clear from liquor (which is the root of all evil) and that begins with staying out of the nightlife.   
3. Who wins in an arm wrestling match between the Park sisters?  Who wins in a Greco-Roman wrestling match?  What about a WWE match?
I'd have to say my sister is taller than me and outweighs me (but not by much), so probably her.  I'm not at the liberty to discuss her measurements but i'm 5'4.5 and 100lbs.  but i could pretty much crush you like a worrum.
4. When will Liz finally be single?
single? whew, i haven't been single for the past 4 years.  i have no idea what that means (except for when i go out of town (^_~)
5. When will Esther be spoken for?
she's too crazy and busy and popular to settle down. or maybe she is lesbitronic? 
Keep blogging.
Totally!
-H.F.W.

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