Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Good evening to you all, netizens of the blogosphere. Early this morning, i reported to the USPoffice to file for a lost or stolen passport and to expedite a new one. Passport expedition costs 200 bones! And if i had wanted to carrier expedite it, i would've had to shell out half a grand. CRAZYBALLS! *displaying empty pockets and sadface* Where it says: Explain the circumstances of your lost/stolen passport i wrote:

"i lost it somewhere in my room! i can't find it anywhere, but i KNOW it's somewhere in my room!![ten exclamation marks and squiggly distress lines]"

What kind of 26 year old am i?? i despise me! who loses their passport in their bedroom? i'm like a friggin hoarder! *see previous entry on hoarders*

I got my picture retaken and i accidentally caught a glimpse of it when the passport lady printed it. i always have a super bloated face! Why is that? i have FFS. fat face syndrome. =( Bunnie says i look funny in all my license pictures because i get nervous and panic right before the CLICK. in my current GA Driver's license, i have black hair and bangs and am wearing a coat because it was cold outside and i forgot to take it off beforehand. now i have blonde hair and no bangs so you see, it was sorta understandable when I was nearly denied entry to a club because the bouncers believed i had a fake; understandable but extremely annoying. (this happened at a really ghettowack club that i never went back to, because they actually pat you down and that only happens at ghettowack clubs *cough* VR *cough*).

well, you wanna know a secret? *leaning in*
i honestly have a phobia of having my picture taken when i'm sober. which explains the same dead stare and vacancy in my eyes in every single pic i am ever in, basically. my veritable "opossum in headlights" expression. but anyway, i need to scan my license pic and passport pic and show you guys. it's hilarious. B exploded in laughter when i showed her. i despise me! why oh why can't i be like my sister and look so incredibly posh in important license pictures? I should scan HER pictures. in her passport, she is wearing a neon yellow dress and a tiara. i am not exaggerating. A TIARA. complete w/ rhinestones... that you wear to a prom. she could care less about judgment and has the balls of a bull in prime. and at the time, she had platinum blonde hair. In her current drivers license picture, she is wearing a gray newsboy cap cocked to the side with a shock of platinum tendrils peeking out. her face is tilted to the side and you can actually feel her hand on her friggin hip! B has seen this as well. It's absolutely insane. *shaking head* I remember at the DMV, she begged the photographer to let her keep the hat: "Please, it's my style!" i would have quickly obliged and taken it off, sheepishly touseling my hair. (because i am a pushover.)

These days i've been sad about my age, something i cannot change and something that will continue to increase, proportionately decreasing my... value. BLAST! =( ah ~ how i wish i was young and in my prime again. prime = 21-22 for females; 31-33 for males. Everything's always easier for men.... and it's a hard knock life for a beta female such as myself.

betafish liz

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